Changing Our Behaviour By Becoming Aware Of Our Habit Loops

Changing Our Behaviour By Becoming Aware Of Our Habit Loops

The process of how our habits form is divided into four stages: Cue, Craving, Routine and Reward. It is helpful to become aware of these fundamental parts when we wish to elicit behaviour change that sticks. The four stages underlie each habit we have, and our brain runs through them in the same order each time. 

Let’s take the example of Jim and June. Jim’s habit is to have a drink every night while watching TV after he gets home from work. He knows that drinking every night is bad for his health, but feels unable to change this habit regardless. June finds herself getting distracted on her phone while at work. Her habit is to pick up her phone when she is feeling stressed. June knows that she could be more productive if she didn’t get distracted by her phone, but, similar to Jim, she feels unable to break free of her pattern of behaviour. 

 

 

Jim and June’s Cue

 

 The Cue is the trigger that initiates the behaviour. For Jim, this was sitting down to watch TV. When Jim switched on the TV he became accustomed to reaching for a drink. Jim’s awareness of his trigger was an essential first step that allowed him to take action in changing the routine. 

June’s cue was feeling overwhelmed by her work. Scrolling through her phone placated the stress she experienced, albeit temporarily. She realised that all she was doing was procrastinating and prolonging the inevitable, which led to her becoming more stressed than she was initially. Once she became aware of her habit loop, it became clear what action was necessary to break the cycle. 

Becoming aware of our cues for unhelpful behaviours is essential. It is only then that we are able to notice what action can be taken to change our behaviour.

 

Jim and June’s Craving 

 

Cravings are the motivational force behind every habit. What you crave is not the habit itself but the change in state it delivers. In Jim’s case, he craved a drink to unwind after a long and stressful day at the office.  Any craving is a desire to change our internal state. Jim realized that he was in an agitated and stressed state when he got home from work, which made him crave a drink to feel more relaxed. June craved a semblance of control that scrolling through her phone brought her when she felt overwhelmed by her work. She wanted to escape her stress and anxiety by scrolling. 

 

Jim and June’s Routine

 

The routine is the action of the habits we display. For Jim, this was drinking every night whilst watching TV. Jim has practised this routine for over three years, so the habit is deeply embedded. However, he got curious and asked himself why he drinks every night, why he wants to stop and what the repercussions will be if he continues. Upon asking these questions, he realised that he drinks every night due to the stress of work. He decided to try reducing this stress a different way by practising 10 minutes of meditation every day after work instead of reaching for a drink. He discovered that he wanted to stop for three reasons – he wanted to be healthy and live a long life, he didn’t want to foster a dependence on alcohol and he was fed up with showing up to work groggy. 

June’s routine was escaping her stress by scrolling through her phone when she felt overwhelmed. She got a promotion two years ago and has not been proactive about delegating her work when she feels like she’s about to take on too much. As such, she feels overwhelmed often, and naturally gravitates towards the phone to alleviate the stress she experiences. She feels as if she isn’t living up to her potential in her company. Her anxiety has bled into her personal life and it has had a knock-on effect on her sleep. She is often restless until the early hours of the morning. For these reasons, she decided she needed to do something about it. She realised her cue was overwhelm, and her response to this was mindless scrolling. To counteract this, she did two things – focused on becoming a better delegator, and left her phone in a different room.  

When we want to change a behaviour, we must ask ourselves WHY. If our WHY is strong enough, then we will choose to change our behaviour, but if it is not then we will not feel compelled to do so. We must get curious around the reasons that underpin our habits so that we know how to change them. 

 

Jim and June’s Reward

 

The reward is the end goal of every habit. They serve the purpose of satisfying cravings. Jim’s reward was the momentary respite alcohol would bring him after a long day at work. Jim realised that the reward he sought was a mental break from the stress of thinking about work. In knowing this, in addition to meditation, he decided to swap the habit of drinking every night for watching a new episode of a series with his girlfriend. It served the same purpose as the drinking, giving him a release from the stresses he experienced from thinking about work. 

June’s reward was the temporary release from the pressure she experienced from her workload. After cultivating awareness around this, she decided to be proactive rather than reactive. She delegated work to her colleagues, practised saying no when she was too busy and left her phone in a different room so she was not tempted. Her reward is the same – a reduction in overall stress and a feeling of being more in control. 

 

What can we do with more awareness?

 

Jim was initially unaware of his habit, falling into the routine without ever taking a moment to realise why he was doing it in the first place. Once he asked himself ‘why’, he realised that the root of the problem was stress. He discovered more positive ways of dealing with this stress through meditation and watching a series with the person he loves. He discovered his reasons for wanting to stop drinking, and they outshone the momentary enjoyment he got from doing it.

June fell into her unhelpful cycle two years ago and has been a victim of distraction ever since. Upon becoming aware of her habit loops and getting curious, she managed to break this cycle. 

We must realise that we can always make a choice to change our habits. Garnering awareness around them is the key to cultivating change. Getting curious, asking yourself why you practice the bad habit you wish to break, getting clear on your cues and rewards and discovering your reasons ‘WHY’ you wish to stop will help you in realising your true potential. 

Think of yourself: what habits do you have that are unhelpful or blocking you from fulfilling your potential? It is worth reflecting upon your habits and habit loops so that you too can break these negative cycles. 

Key Takeaways:

 

1. The four stages of a habit are Cue, Craving, Routine and Reward, understanding each stage develops our self-awareness and helps us to take action.

2. Get curious about your own behaviour.

3. Focus on the ‘WHY.’ Discover what is important to you and use it as your reason to change.

4. Gather awareness around your cues and rewards.

5. It’s up to you. You can make decisions to change your habits.

Priming Yourself for Change

 

 Do you always set out with the best of intentions to get more done on your to-do list or stop procrastination, yet more often than not find yourself running out of hours in the day and getting distracted frequently? How we manage our time will determine whether or not we reach our fullest potential.

Productivity is counterintuitive. Ironically, the more we try to do in a day, the more susceptible we are to stress and overwhelm, meaning the work we do is more likely to be completed at a lesser standard. Other consequences of stress and overwhelm include forgetfulness, slower mental processing, and difficulty focusing to name a few, all of which can derail productivity. Knowing this, it is important for us to be realistic with the amount we can get done in a day so that we can set ourselves up for success.

 

Cornerstones of Successful Time Management

Focus and avoiding distraction are crucial facets of establishing a schedule and routine that support us in feeling successful.  Did you know that it takes 23 minutes to return to the original task after getting distracted? Distraction is a time bandit that we must train ourselves to be aware of and manage. It is key to first become aware of what is distracting us, then take intentional action to manage that distraction. Take the device in our pockets for example.  If your phone is distracting you,  then why not switch it off and leave it in a different room? This has been of great benefit to myself personally, and has allowed me to remain focused on the task at hand by intentionally removing the source of distraction.

Delegation and prioritization are also essential if you wish to make better use of your time. Understandably, delegation may prove a difficult task for those who think it’s always quicker to get the job done yourself. However, you are doing your colleagues a disservice by not delegating – we all have to start somewhere, and without allowing them the added responsibility they will not progress at a rate that will benefit them or your company. Prioritization is a crucial skill to master, we need to figure out which items are truly important to us, not just urgent, and learn to delegate or say no when we feel like we’ve taken on too much.

 

What Can We Do?

 Practice thinking about Time Management as a learnable skill set. Learning is often misconceived as an event rather than a process. New information takes months to embed and behavioural change is gradual. Over the course of her 15 years in the field of change and growth psychology, Dr Celine Mullins has devised a 7-step programme to enable people to elicit positive behaviour change that counteracts old patterns of behaviour and helps develop learning and habit change. I’m going to take you through the two steps that I personally found the most helpful in cultivating my self-awareness around what was holding me back from becoming much more efficient at managing my time. 

Clarity: What?

What is it you would like to change about how you manage your time? What would you like to do more of, less of, or do differently? Getting clarity on the specifics is where we need to begin.  Get as tangible as you possibly can, as any ambiguity will hamper your chances of achieving positive change. For example, instead of saying “I want to procrastinate less” you might say “I realise my procrastination trigger is stress and my response is to go on my phone. I will rectify this issue by leaving my phone in a different room”. 

Once you have realized your ‘what’, you must then check in with how you see yourself. Is it in alignment with the change you want to make? Recognizing incongruencies between how you see yourself and your goal can help you to understand what it is you need to change. For example: “when it comes to time management, I’m the type of person that procrastinates by checking my phone”. To this end, you realise you can fix this issue by switching off your phone or leaving it in a different room. 

After we have realized our ‘what’ and whether how we see ourselves is in alignment with it, we then need to visualise ourselves doing it. Visualisation improves performance, motivation and focus. It involves creating a picture of what you want to happen. When visualizing, it is important to be as detailed as possible. How does it feel, use all your senses associated with your body when imagining it. For example, picture yourself getting stressed about an upcoming project, yet choosing not to procrastinate. Imagine how it would feel to lean into that discomfort and take action instead of avoiding the task. What might that look like? This mental and physical rehearsal allows us to be cognizant of recognizing these opportunities in real life. 

 

Obstacles: Which?

We must get really clear on what the potential obstacles to change might be for us. We must look at the internal and external obstacles. Internal are our limiting beliefs – the assumptions we have around why we cannot achieve our goals. For example, if someone has always wanted to get fit and they are currently overweight, a limiting belief might be that they think that they have bad genetics and resign themselves to not going to the gym and eating unhealthy foods. In terms of time management, our belief that we are naturally disorganised, slow, or not smart enough can prevent us from taking action to improve our time management skills. Our external obstacles, on the other hand, are our life responsibilities such as our career or family. 

Once we have identified the internal and external obstacles that could prevent us from achieving our goals, we must now mentally contrast. Mental contrasting involves thinking about several different positive aspects associated with completing your goal. This will help you to keep consistent. It is a visualization technique developed by Gabriele Oettingen, a motivation psychologist who wished to improve the effectiveness of traditional self-control strategies like positive-future visualization. The technique improves cognitive functioning, health and promotes helpful behaviours. 

The final step is implementation. How are you going to overcome each obstacle if they do arise? Use the ‘if-then’ method. For example, “If I get distracted by my phone, then I will switch it off and put it in another room” or “If I get overwhelmed, then I will focus on my breathing and be realistic with how much I can get done in a day”. 

 

Resistance to Change

When presented with change, our brain leans into a self-protection mode and will do everything it can to cling to the comfortability of what it already knows. Change is a process, not an overnight event, but with the implementation of these steps you are guiding yourself in the right direction towards improving your time management skills. 

 

To Summarise

 

1. Productivity is counterintuitive – be realistic with what you can accomplish in a day to avoid stress and overwhelm

 

2. Focus, avoiding distraction, delegation and prioritization are all crucial elements of time management

 

3. Get clear on what it is that is holding you back from improving your time management

 

4. Become aware of the potential obstacles and how you will overcome them

 

5. Realise that nothing happens overnight, habit change is a process, but using these steps will put you in the driving seat of your time management skills

What Can Your Biggest Sporting Hero Tell You About Success?

Updated July 26th 2023

I’ve been talking a lot about habits recently; getting rid of the ones that are doing us no good and replacing with ones that are beneficial to our life, including health, work and relationships.

You may recall I mentioned that it takes the average person 66 days for new behaviours to become unchangingly automatic, with research finding it can take some people up to 245 days to change a habit. The reason for this is that it can take a while to strengthen the connection between neurons representing the new behaviour.

However you may not be this patient, I know I certainly am not! Consequently, I have frequently abandoned my efforts to establish new, beneficial, and healthier habits in the past. Some of my attempts have included many efforts to eat healthier, getting fit and staying fit, maintaining a level of contentedness and gratitude in my daily life, blogging weekly about Adaptas™ or topics of interest to clients and friends of Adaptas™, posting daily messages in social media that might be helpful to anyone who cares to read in the area of communication in the workplace and behavioural change. The list goes on and on…frankly, we could be here all day!

Consider this, have you ever envisioned the person you want to become, the knowledge you seek to acquire, or the goals you wish to achieve? Visualisation as a method of actualisation has been extensively studied in Cognitive Psychology and Sports Psychology. Accomplished athletes harness the power of visualisation, which involves mentally rehearsing physical skills without actual movement

Numerous studies with athletes have revealed that combining the mental visualisation of a skill with its physical execution leads to more effective learning and retention of the skill. Any elite athlete will emphasise the significance of mental preparation strategies in achieving peak performance. The underlying science shows that these techniques reinforce the neural pathways crucial for skill enhancement, as previously mentioned.

Having studied Psychology in-depth since my teenage years, I have acquired comprehensive knowledge about the reinforcement of neural connections and related aspects. In fact, my fascination with understanding human nature, our behavior, and the influence of experiences started at a very young age, around 8 years old (possibly even earlier, though I can’t recall those early years). Observing people and their responses to various environments has always intrigued me, however I must admit that my biggest case study has most often been myself.

Even though I knew all about visualisation, it really only hit me recently (i.e. that there are ways to speed up these neuronal connections), through conversation with my colleague Erika Brodnock (Erika Brodnock, CEO and Founder, The Centre for Positive Children Ltd), that if you actually visualise the neuronal connections happening, you can speed up the process of changing your habits!

If you want to learn about effectively visualising (not all of us find it easy!), keep an eye on our blogs in coming weeks.