Blog

Updated July 26th 2023

I have managers coming to me for coaching quite regularly, telling me they want to develop their charisma, so that they will be in the running for a position opening up for VP, director or partner. They seem to think there is a potion I can give to them that will make their charisma magically grow.

Oh how wonderful it would be if I could create this potion. We could all swallow it and become as charismatic and as influential as JFK, Oprah, Obama, Princess Diana, Gandhi, Reagan, Clinton (insert your favorite here). Love them or hate them, they’ve got charisma! And like all of us, none of them are, or were perfect!

Can you think of a charismatic person you know or have met? What was it about them that made them charismatic in your opinion? Did they talk endlessly about themselves with unbridled enthusiasm and confidence? Or was it a two-way conversation where they engaged by asking questions, showing genuine interest in your responses, and spoke about themselves only when they had information, a fact, a story, or an experience that could be of assistance or interest to you?

(If you don’t want to read this article but would like to see 2 new jokes I learnt today, skip to the end)

What most people in search of charisma don’t realise is that research shows us that charismatic people are those that display not only confidence, but consideration and empathy. They are people who offer social support to others, and are trustworthy. In organisations, they are the people who have close interaction and exchange with the people on their teams, and who build strong social networks.

Charisma and Leadership are often seen going hand in hand. Have you heard of transformational leadership? Transformational leaders are those leaders able to inspire their followers to accomplish great things i.e. to move their followers to a high level of performance by affective and inspirational engagement through idealised influence, inspirational motivation, intellectual stimulation and individualised consideration. To do this, they are required to be mindful of the needs and motivations of others, facilitate complex interactions in group dynamics and steer their employees forward in the course of their managerial/decision-making responsibilities.

Research finds that transformational leaders are regarded as charismatic. These leaders do the following:
• Display consideration and empathy
• Possess mature moral development
• Have close interaction and exchange with their people
• Build strong social networks within their organisations
• Offer social support to the individuals and teams they manage

Effective leaders are transformational and charismatic. Those who display traits listed above exhibit high standards of performance and ethics and are deeply trusted and respected by their followers. Because of that people identify with and want to emulate them. Would you like people to identify with and emulate you?

Interestingly, a meta-analysis of trust and effective leadership has shown that when leaders are perceived as trustworthy, this translates into perceived organizational trustworthiness and results in positive employee and organizational outcomes (Dirks & Ferrin, 2002) such as higher organisational citizenship behaviors (Krosgaard, Brodt, & Whitener, 2002).

By the way, charisma isn’t the same thing as confidence, but appearing confident can make you more charismatic because your confidence will put others at ease and inspire faith in your abilities. If people see you as a confident person, they will naturally want to be around you.

There is no magic potion, funny that!. Charisma is not about being an extrovert or about pretending to care about other people. It’s about genuinely liking other people. The emotional component of that is really hard to fake! But when you have it, other people feel important. Furthermore, if you don’t have it now but are willing to start practicing the true traits of charismatic people, you will even end up enjoying yourself more, regardless of who you are with!

Some charismatic people tell jokes!

Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other: “Funny, I smell carrots too”.

That didn’t make you laugh…Ok try this:

A magician was driving down the road, then he turned into a drive way…

Ah I give up…